cursed
This week has been a rollercoaster-ride for me. And I am not a fan of roller coasters.
It all started a heartbreak. I thought that this guy I met was going to be “it”. Although I am not looking for someone whom I can spend the rest of my life with (I am too young to do just that.), I am looking for someone whom I will be with for a long time. There comes a time when I get tired of playing. There comes a time when I do not look for just sex. This is the time. I have known the guy for just a short time, and yet, I fell for him. I thought he was an amazing guy. Until I realized that he had not been to honest with me. In short, I was fooled—again.
I cried hard the whole of Tuesday—the day I realized it was all just a lie. I cried myself to sleep. I cried upon waking up. I cried before eating.
I have cried for two straight days. That is why on Thursday, I went to watch the basketball game pitting UST against FEU . Good thing Ja-ne and Jewel accompanied to watch the game with me. You see, Varsi people have always stopped me from watching the game. They believe I was the jinx. Each time I watch, UST loses. But I still went. I did not mind if UST would miss the services of JoDun and Jun Cortez. I did not mind if UST would likely lose to FEU. Good thing, I did not give a damn. UST won the match. It was the first game I watched live that UST won. Yes, it was my first time in my three years of college life.
Now, the guy who fooled me and I are back on speaking terms. He sent me a letter on Thursday night apologizing for what he did. Here are some excerpts:
i know that ur not ok, and its all my fault.i just make u feel miserable.lonely.and stupid. i take all the blame now, it just gone flat on my face.you can say anything to me now.ill catch it all.murahin mo na ko! please.
Ivan im so sorry. im very sorry. the only truth in me is my feelings for you.totoo yon. mahal na mahal kita. di ko lang alam na aabot ito nang ganito ka kumplikado.aabot sa point na even i will fall on my own imagination.di ko alam na mag mamahal ako at in return may mag mamahal din sakin.
kala ko after a few days wala ka na at wala na din ako, hindi pala iyon ka dali.
am at school kanina,depressed pa rin. pinipilit kong tumawa sa mga joke nila but it seems bland.then naalala ko nanaman ung ginawa ko sau then my tears just run down.shit.umiyak nanaman ako without knowing it.sa school pa.i rember our conversation.our plans.ur joke about uod! am still laughing if i remember it. and i always will.
We’ve told each other that we are going to fix things. I am expecting him to be honest this time. I used to love the guy—the guy he told he was. Now, I am giving him another chance. Maybe we’ll end up as friends. Or maybe I’ll hate him the rest of my life. Or maybe he’s the one I am looking for.
Woohoo, today UST avenged its first-round loss to Ateneo which murdered the Tigers. I did not watch the game live. I was afraid Atenedo will have another blow-out win agains UST. But to my surprise, and I guess to the surprise of all Thomasians and Atenistas, the Growling Tigers dealt the Blue Eagles their first loss in nine outings. No sweep for the Katipunan-based squad this season.
The win was very important because a loss would have pulled the Tigers, who were seating at third place prior to today’s match, to the 5th spot. Maganda ang nilaro ng mga Tigers kahit na wala sila Jodun at Cortez, at ngayon pati na rin si Espiritu. Lahat sila may Typhoid Fever. There must be something wrong with the food the Tigers are eating. Tsk tsk.
I’ve already thought the Tigers’ chances to a final 4 slot were going against God’s will. I, together with many Thomasians, was already losing hope. But after three straight wins, the Tigers may just be able to clinch a place in the final 4. That will please me—after all, it only takes a single basketball game to please me after a heartbreak.
Smile naman dyan!! God bless us all!!
P.S. Pahabol!! Please make sure to get a copy of the latest issue of the varsitarian!! Akin yung banner story eh tungkol dun sa nursing leak eh!! hehehe!! laking pagod ang pinagdaanan ko para lang matapos yung istoryang iyun!!
It all started a heartbreak. I thought that this guy I met was going to be “it”. Although I am not looking for someone whom I can spend the rest of my life with (I am too young to do just that.), I am looking for someone whom I will be with for a long time. There comes a time when I get tired of playing. There comes a time when I do not look for just sex. This is the time. I have known the guy for just a short time, and yet, I fell for him. I thought he was an amazing guy. Until I realized that he had not been to honest with me. In short, I was fooled—again.
I cried hard the whole of Tuesday—the day I realized it was all just a lie. I cried myself to sleep. I cried upon waking up. I cried before eating.
I have cried for two straight days. That is why on Thursday, I went to watch the basketball game pitting UST against FEU . Good thing Ja-ne and Jewel accompanied to watch the game with me. You see, Varsi people have always stopped me from watching the game. They believe I was the jinx. Each time I watch, UST loses. But I still went. I did not mind if UST would miss the services of JoDun and Jun Cortez. I did not mind if UST would likely lose to FEU. Good thing, I did not give a damn. UST won the match. It was the first game I watched live that UST won. Yes, it was my first time in my three years of college life.
Now, the guy who fooled me and I are back on speaking terms. He sent me a letter on Thursday night apologizing for what he did. Here are some excerpts:
i know that ur not ok, and its all my fault.i just make u feel miserable.lonely.and stupid. i take all the blame now, it just gone flat on my face.you can say anything to me now.ill catch it all.murahin mo na ko! please.
Ivan im so sorry. im very sorry. the only truth in me is my feelings for you.totoo yon. mahal na mahal kita. di ko lang alam na aabot ito nang ganito ka kumplikado.aabot sa point na even i will fall on my own imagination.di ko alam na mag mamahal ako at in return may mag mamahal din sakin.
kala ko after a few days wala ka na at wala na din ako, hindi pala iyon ka dali.
am at school kanina,depressed pa rin. pinipilit kong tumawa sa mga joke nila but it seems bland.then naalala ko nanaman ung ginawa ko sau then my tears just run down.shit.umiyak nanaman ako without knowing it.sa school pa.i rember our conversation.our plans.ur joke about uod! am still laughing if i remember it. and i always will.
We’ve told each other that we are going to fix things. I am expecting him to be honest this time. I used to love the guy—the guy he told he was. Now, I am giving him another chance. Maybe we’ll end up as friends. Or maybe I’ll hate him the rest of my life. Or maybe he’s the one I am looking for.
Woohoo, today UST avenged its first-round loss to Ateneo which murdered the Tigers. I did not watch the game live. I was afraid Atenedo will have another blow-out win agains UST. But to my surprise, and I guess to the surprise of all Thomasians and Atenistas, the Growling Tigers dealt the Blue Eagles their first loss in nine outings. No sweep for the Katipunan-based squad this season.
The win was very important because a loss would have pulled the Tigers, who were seating at third place prior to today’s match, to the 5th spot. Maganda ang nilaro ng mga Tigers kahit na wala sila Jodun at Cortez, at ngayon pati na rin si Espiritu. Lahat sila may Typhoid Fever. There must be something wrong with the food the Tigers are eating. Tsk tsk.
I’ve already thought the Tigers’ chances to a final 4 slot were going against God’s will. I, together with many Thomasians, was already losing hope. But after three straight wins, the Tigers may just be able to clinch a place in the final 4. That will please me—after all, it only takes a single basketball game to please me after a heartbreak.
Smile naman dyan!! God bless us all!!
P.S. Pahabol!! Please make sure to get a copy of the latest issue of the varsitarian!! Akin yung banner story eh tungkol dun sa nursing leak eh!! hehehe!! laking pagod ang pinagdaanan ko para lang matapos yung istoryang iyun!!
posted by queen of the blogs at 7:02 AM
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