tao lang: i make mistakes and i learn from them.

My spirits are low. Since being part of V, I have always been consistent in saying and writing that wrorking for the paper is not an easy task. Gathering your materials, putting them to writing, waiting for your editor to check them, revising them, then waiting for the approval of all your editors are all too arduous. But I am not the one to complain. I applied for this. And I look at the experience as a challenge where I can also learn a lot.

Having your editors correct your work may seem painful for others. Being edited can crush your ego and your belief that you have talent. I admit I feel that too. But most of the time, I consider it a learning experience. I see to it that I thank all my editors after they correct my works because I learn a lot from them. They know better and more than I do. But what I read hours back crushed my heart.

“If you want to stay as V staffer, you better shape up.”
“You can laugh and make fun in the office but make sure that you enter the corrections accurately.”
“Your article is prima facie evidence of carelessness and indifference.”

Those remarks did not hurt me. Having overlooked at some of the corrections I was supposed to enter was my fault. What hurt me was this:

“Take your work seriously.”

Excuse me. But I am taking my work seriously . I regularly come to the office with the main purpose of working, not mingling with the other staffers. Socializing with them is only secondary. I sacrifice the time that I should be spending with my dad— who only returns to the Philippines during our summer vacation— just to go to the office and work. And you think I am not taking my work seriously? You think that I am not taking my work seriously because I overlooked some of the corrections? Please, give me a break.

Tonight the selection committee deliberates on who gets the ax and who stays. If I get the ax, it will be painful. I will be bitter but only for a short time. After all, I will take with me all the lessons I have learned from my editors and from the other writers. I will also take the memories of going on an outing with the V staff in Caylabne and spending 3 days in Caleruega for the retreat. I will also take with me the relationships I formed with the friends I met in V. The biggest regret I will have is missing on doing a lot of things with my dad this summer to go the V office and take my work seriously .

Hours back, I prayed to the Lord. Do not let this destroy my spirits. This is only a challenge.

Please understand why I am writing this. I was and still hurt. But this, too, shall pass.

Smile naman dyan!! God bless us all!!